It’s Dangerous, I’m falling
I got a phone call today from my sexless Internet lover Brent (in Kansas City). It was so very good to hear from him. I don’t think he got the conversation he anticipated when he called me. I don’t think I got the conversation I anticipated - something happened.. Before I realized what was going on I had gone on a twenty-minute bitch fest to him of everything that is going on in my life right now. I’m so sick of being stoic all the time.
I’m going to let it all out.
Firstly, since it is presently on my mind, I really hate how grocery stores pipe the fried-chicken vent into the air-conditioning system. I just got home from the grocery store and I smell like a fucking KFC. It’s disgusting. Fucking quit it already.
It is so very stressful having all of the people I know and care about dump their problems on me. I am so very glad that people think enough of me to share their innermost thoughts. I cannot imagine what it is like to be a professional therapist. It’s even harder when a group of people all relate their thoughts and emotions about each other to me. So I hear all the bad stuff that they all think about each other.
I really dislike how some people play stupid while in the background they are calculating exactly every move and counter-move. They play stupid because that way when they say something inappropriate people just chalk it up to them being ditzy.
Today in my Art History lecture our professor was talking about the commonalities between Islam, Christianity and Judaism are. Keeping in mind that he is giving out this information as a base to compare the ancient artworks of these civilizations to each other a woman in the front of the lecture hall begins to argue with him that all three religions do not worship the same God. She could not get in her mind that Islam does not see Jesus as the messiah or as the Son of God nor do they believe in the trinity (Father, Son & Spirit), but that they do see him as one of the major prophets of their worldview. Thus beings a 5-6 minute debate between her and the professor about how her Jesus Christ is the Son of God and blah blah blah. You could FEEL the tension rippling across the 400+ seat lecture hall as people were getting frustrated with her for arguing her religious views in an ART HISTORY class. If you want to debate shit like that take religious studies or go hold up a sign on campus. Don’t waste my time.
I love Mr. Bigglesworth with all my heart, but sometimes he’s just plain ridiculous. I don’t want to snuggle when I’ve just ridden my bike home from campus. I’m hot and sweaty and don’t need a 12lb, 100ºF ball of fur sitting on me.
The people who run my apartment complex are stupid. I’ve told them three or four times now that my dryer is not hooked up properly and is not venting to the outside like it should be. So today maintenance finally comes to see what I’m bitching about. They ask me what’s wrong with it and I say it isn’t hooked up right. They go and look at the dryer, turn it on, and ask me what’s wrong again. I take a deep breath because at this point my fuse is very short and I explain as best as I can that the hose that connects to the wall that vents the hot humid air of the dryer to the outside is not even present and that said hot humid air is venting directly into my apartment. So they take another look and decide that there isn’t anything that they personally can do, and that they will call the appliance people.
Fucking genius.
Another thing that is pissing me off is Microsoft Word. For some reason if I make my font size larger than 12 on certain fonts, Word fucks up the line spacing and it looks like everything is double-spaced. If I select it and click single-space it ignores me. If I select it and click double-space it ignores me. Sometimes I hate computers.
I still have no idea what I am going to do for spring break. I am debating on if I want to just make a fuckitall road-trip someplace. But I know myself and I’ll just end up staying home, staying up too late, and sleeping in even later and feeling super shitty about everything.
It really worries me when I start to think that maybe Tom Cruise is right when he says anti-depressant medications don’t work, because I’m certainly not feeling any better.
I will end this with a quote:
Feelings are not supposed to be logical. Dangerous is the man who has rationalized his emotions.
– David Borenstein.